Happy Friday Southernistas! I hope y’all had a great work week and that you are ready for the weekend! For some of us it was a four day work week due to the celebration of the life of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
I don’t know about y’all but winter has really arrived here in North Carolina and we’ve had more rainy and cloudy days then sunny days. The temperature has dropped with the exception of two days of 60+ degree weather this week. With the days being so gray I’ve taken the opportunity to wear more color and the one color I decided to wear was white. I usually don’t wear white because as a southern girl it was ingrained in me that you don’t wear white after Labor Day. This is so ingrained in me that I really don’t even think about wearing white in the winter unless it is for a church service.
On my fashion journey I am constantly pushing myself to step outside my comfort zone and when I was deciding what to wear my eyes fell on this beautiful Karl Lagerfeld (yes that Karl) skirt I got from a previous Stitch Fix box I almost put it back thinking this is for Spring but then I said to myself “Regina break that no white after Labor day rule!” and so I pulled it out the closet again and paired it with my favorite white sweater from Full Beauty.
I am so glad I did because when I saw the total look it was an instant mood lifter for me and even though it is winter I felt like a beautiful Spring day! So remember to toss outdated fashion rules out the window and wear your white!
Until next time Southernistas remember to Be Bold, Be Beautiful, Be Confident!
Skirt Stitch Fix | Sweater Full Beauty | Shoes DSW | Denim Trench Coat Eloquii | Bag Payless Shoe Source
Hello Southernistas! I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas! Hard to believe that 2018 is almost over and 2019 is almost here! I know it’s been a while since I blogged but I just wanted to enjoy the holiday season. It was my plan to start 2019 off with a new blog but a few months ago this date popped in my mind and I couldn’t get away from it no matter how hard I tried. I knew it was the Holy Spirit prompting me to share with you why this date has special meaning. I hope as you read this you find encouragement, that it strengthens your walk with Jesus (if you have a relationship), that it leads you to a relationship with Jesus, and that it will help you to realize you are not alone.
2013 was not an easy year for me at all I was living in a one bedroom apartment and everyday I came home to an empty apartment was depressing. I always felt like I lived such a solitary life at that time. I remember waking up every morning with a feeling of hopelessness and I just didn’t know how to handle what I was feeling. These are not feelings that just suddenly came up I had been dealing with depression for years but it was now so crippling I could barely function. I remember going to church and feeling nothing, praying and feeling nothing, it seemed like I was just going through the motions of my life but I wasn’t living.
I was in a really bad car accident early in the year and thank God he brought me, my Mom, and my niece out alive. I was sued for an large sum of money I didn’t have and so I had to give a deposition and go back to the city the accident happened for a mediation and God was on my side and delivered me from that situation but I was still so sad. I spent that whole year putting on a mask while I sat at home and cried my heart out.
When December arrived I had had enough of this life and I had made the decision to end my life. I had really good reasons, at least to me, for taking this step. Life had just gotten so hard and although I have a loving family, a loving Church, and friends I felt so alone and isolated. I believed that if I died no one would miss me and my daughter is an adult now and she doesn’t need me. I’m single and over 40 and it seemed that no matter how hard I tried nothing was working out in my life. At that time these reasons seems valid. I remember wanting to talk to someone but couldn’t because there were no words there were only tears. I remember how abandoned I felt by God and that this was as good as it was going to get.
I remember getting up that Sunday so sad and getting ready for church. I remember the feeling of finality that Sunday and after church I felt like I was seeing everyone for the last time. I laughed, I smiled, I said my I love yous to my Pastor & my Assistant Pastor. I remember hugging everyone because I was saying good bye to them for one last time. When my mother dropped me at home I remember looking at her and thinking this is the last time I will see my her beautiful smiling face. I said good by to my daughter although she didn’t realize it at the time because again I had on the mask.
That evening I got out the bottle of pills I had and looked around my sad little apartment. Just when I was getting ready to take the pills I heard a voice and I know it was the voice of God and that voice spoke one word and that word was…LIVE! In that moment I knew that I wanted to live that I didn’t want to die that no matter how my life was it was still worth living. I begin to just sob my heart out and with every tear that fell I knew God was doing something inside. I don’t remember how long I stood there sobbing but I do remember after while flushing those pills down the toilet going on my knees and crying out to Jesus and He reached out to me and touched me and healed me.
Sometimes life gets so hard for us and it becomes unbearable but I encourage you who are reading this blog to seek help don’t try to go it alone like I did. Seeking help is not admitting you’re weak or that you don’t have a strong faith in God it means that you are strong enough to realize you can’t do it on your own. It means that you realize that how you are feeling is not how you want to fee. There is nothing wrong with getting professional help.
That was 5 years ago today and I am still single but in these 5 years I’ve learned how to be single, I moved back in with my Mom, and life is good! I think about all I would have missed if I had ignored God’s voice calling me to live and not die.
December 29, 2013 was suppose to be the day I died but it became the day I lived and I have never looked back.
Hey Southernistas! I hope y’all are enjoying your Labor Day weekend and that you are truly enjoying this last official holiday of the Summer.
Since I started this journey of loving myself and discovering fashion I will admit that my shopping has kicked up a notch. Whereas I use to go shopping and felt like nothing looked good on me I now go shopping and walk out with several pieces or I’m online ordering. For the past several months there has been a box waiting for me practically everyday.
In the month of July I busted my budget and the blame lays squarely at Eloquii’s feet! I mean I’m only human and who could resist their clearance sale where you could get 80% off can we say hello Draper James collection! After practically melting my credit card I decided that for the month of August I would put myself on a shopping band and shop my closet. This was not an easy thing to do especially when Dress Barn was having an amazing sale (75%off) and so was Lane Bryant and then Eloquii had their dress sale but nevertheless I resisted (even if I did dream about shopping) and stuck to my decision not to buy anything new but wear what is already in my closet. Now that August has passed and September has arrived I can honestly say I am so glad I made the decision to shop my closet and my wallet is thankful too. I rediscovered dresses that I really loved and it forced me to really think and put together outfits everyday plus I got to wear at least 4 of the 7 pairs of shoes I bought in July from Eloquii (did I mention they were 80% off). I encourage you to shop your closet and experiment with putting together outfits. Everyday was a new discovery in my closet and so I wanted to share some of my favorite looks from August.
Until next time Southernistas remember Be Bold, Be Fearless, Be Confident!
I must confess that I have not always been crazy about floral prints but I must admit they are starting to grow on me. I think it’s because floral prints are a staple in every Southern woman’s closet but it has been a fashion rule that they are not for plus size women and for me my aversion was along the same lines as my one time aversion to polka dots that being I don’t want to look fat but I have to remind myself I don’t look fat I am fat (it’s just an adjective) so I can toss that logic out the window. Floral prints to me have also represented old lady style whenever I thought about them. I never looked at them as fresh or pretty I just looked at them and thought Grandma. Slowly I’m starting to feel this print and it is a good feeling. I see them as not only fresh and pretty but they are a great mood lifter especially in the winter when I’m longing for Spring to arrive. I know I’m repeating myself when I say this but there is a floral print for everyBODY and it’s up to you to decide how bold you want to go with your choice. I’m sure by now you Southernistas know that I like to go pretty bold with my fashion choices and that goes for a floral print. When I got my last fix from Stitch Fix my stylist Rebecca included this beautiful floral maxi dress and I could not be happier. I love the bold flowers on this dress and I decided to pair it with my Botkier floral wedges (here)and this cute tote from Nine West and a simple necklace. When I saw myself in this floral maxi dress the only thoughts that popped in my head was how good I looked in this dress and how much I loved the big bold flowers because it represents my new outlook on life!
Until next time Southernistas remember Be Bold, Be Fearless, Be Confident!
Now I know I just did a post on JustFab this past Friday but as I said in my previous post (click here) they not only offer shoes but also clothes, handbags, and other accessories. In 2016 JustFab launched there plus size line up to a 3X and I’ve purchase several pieces. They don’t offer all of there clothes in plus sizes but they do have a really great selection and hopefully they will extend there sizes even more to become truly size inclusive. I have found the sizing to be pretty consistent across the board and they are constantly improving the fit and quality of their clothes. If you have large arms like I do I would read the reviews first before purchasing their coats and jackets. You do have to complete a style profile and join JustFab to order from the website but you have the option every month to skip that month and you will not be charged the $39.95. This summer they launched a really great swimwear collection that is size inclusive. Check out JustFab and let me know what you think.
Until next time remember Be Bold, Be Fearless, Be Confident!
If you follow me on Instagram (if you don’t why aren’t you?!) you will notice the one print I am obsessed with gingham! I have rediscovered my love of gingham and the fact that it is a trend that looks like it going to around for a while makes me so happy although if it wasn’t I would still wear this print. I own several gingham dresses, skirts, shoes and I plan to buy even more. Gingham doesn’t just come in black and white print but you can get gingham in many colors and it’s up to you how big or small you want to go with the print. For me this print is summer and if there was an official print/pattern of summer it would be gingham. I know there are some of you who aren’t crazy about this print because you believe it makes you look like a picnic blanket and I say what’s wrong with that? Picnics are fun and if I’m wearing something that makes you think of a picnic in the park friends & family or that special someone then all the more reason to wear gingham. Trying to decide what to wear for the 4th of July and you don’t want to do the obvious red, white, and blue or wear shorts and a t-shirt but want a more chic look this is the print that will take your look from super causal to chic and casual. For me as a Southerner gingham is that quintessential southern print for a southern lady. When I saw this dress on Lane Bryant’s website I knew it would be the perfect look for this July 4th holiday.
I decided I wanted a casual look so I wore these cute white mules from Payless Shoe Source and do a little print mixing with probably my favorite tote from JustFab.com.
If you don’t have any gingham in your wardrobe I encourage you to add it to your closet. For more gingham fashion click here, here, here, here, here, here, here.
Have a great 4th of July and remember BE BOLD, BE FEARLESS, BE CONFIDENT!
When I think about how much time I spent letting fear of what people think of me hold me back from living my life I could kick myself…hard! I allowed fear to rule my life way too long. Fear of what I would look like if I wore that color or that print or those pants. Fear of people laughing at me over my looks, my hair, you name it I thought about it got scared and decided I can’t wear that or do that because what will they think of me. They?! Who are they anyway? They are small minded petty people who get enjoyment out of making your life miserable because they are miserable. We spend way too much time letting fear rule our lives when the only fear we should have is the reverent fear of God the creator of heaven and earth. I decided that this is what I wanted to talk about in this blog after hearing the new song Fear Is a Liarby christian artist Zach Williams and the line in the song that really hit home for me was “fear he is a liar, he will take your breath, stop you in your steps” fear does all this and so much more. Fear will cause you to miss out on some of the greatest opportunities, great relationships, and the worst of all it will stop you from living . Fear robs us of so much! As I celebrate my 47th year on this earth the one thing I really celebrate is that I let go of all those fears that I allowed to rule my life. I’ve squashed those negative voices that were so loud in my head for a lot of my life. I’ve decided to be fearless in my approach to fashion. I now take those fashion risks.
This is not to say I never have moments of doubt or that those fears have gone completely away I would be lying. What I am saying is that when those fears and doubts, the negative thoughts raises their ugly head I’ve learned to combat them with all the positives in my life. I look in the mirror I see a beautiful and confidant woman who God loves. I am precious in His sight and I don’t have to be a certain size to earn the Father’s love. He has blessed me with a wonderful family, an awesome church family (shout out to AHOD), a really awesome Pastor and Assistant Pastor who has encouraged and supported me in the new phase of my life. It’s all because of Jesus who has made me fearless.
As I celebrate my birthday I encourage you today to conquer whatever that fear is that is holding you back. Wear that dress in that color, print, or pattern that you always wanted to wear but didn’t because someone said “it’s cute but it’s really not you” or “it would look good on you if you lost ____lbs.” Love yourself now.
As the great Rosalind Russell said in the movie Auntie Mame “life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death!” So Be Fearless!